BREAKING NEWS: Agoraphobia is the new social crack-cocaine.

Social-comedian, and all-around common sense peddler, JP Sears has a thing or two to say about the riff of paranoia permeating the social-sphere.

First, he wants you to just accept the fact that “It’s definitely gonna kill you. The only way to protect yourself from COVID-19 is to buy a casket now.”

Now onto the rest of the hilarity about this over-the-top sensationalized worldwide “pandemic:”

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